This is my version of the original Dear Mom on the iPhone or as my husband says “The way I feel.” Hoping this encourages someone else out there.
Dear Mom On the iPhone,
I see you over there on the bench, on your iPhone. I know you feel like on the outside you look like you have it all together….just another day sitting on a park bench in the sun while your kids play, but I know on the inside you feel like you just want to curl into a ball and cry. You’re exhausted! You work so very hard! You’re trying to do the best you can to make sure your kids have all the therapies they need, that the insurance companies will cover the providers they need to see, that you have enough money in your account to cover these therapies until insurance decides to start paying, that you have thoroughly researched all of the options, but you often times feel like its just you against the whole, big, wide world. You worry about whether or not the choices you are making for your kids will produce the desired results (because God knows everyone has an opinion to share with you), and it breaks your heart to think of all the “mommy things” you are missing out on while you are just doing your best just to keep your head above water!
But Momma, let me tell you what you don’t see right now…..
While you might not be doing all the “mommy things” that everyone says are so important and that you are going to regret missing, you are doing what’s most important by trying to give your child the best shot possible at being able to participate in the world.
I know you feel bad for letting your kids run wild and shout for your attention, while you sit on your phone….checking your bank account, checking the weekly therapy schedule, checking your insurance benefits, reading your Bible app, reading a chapter in the new book on your Kindle app, texting with a friend, or playing a game of Dice with Friends.
But you know what, I know you’ve had a tough day, and no matter what age we are sometimes we all need a time-out!
And if you can take a time-out on your phone (while monitoring your children’s safety) so that you can pull yourself together enough to make it to the end of the day…..who am I kidding? I mean until naptime or the next “mommy time-out!!!!”……Then Do It!
Being a Mommy isn’t all about enjoying your kids or doing the “mommy things”….sometimes being a Mommy is about surviving……doing the best you can with what God has given you…..and sometimes that means stopping and taking a little break to take care of Mommy, the one who spends 24/7 taking care of other people.
Put your eyes back on the prize…God’s will for your life.
Your children know that they are important to you. You show it to them every day in all the little things you do for them….in the meals you lovingly prepare (or the McDonalds you pick-up)…..in the laundry to do (or the clothes you sniff to make sure they don’t stink)…..in all the hours you spend in the car taking them to appointments…..in the time you spend on the phone advocating for them…..and in the little moments throughout the day you use to give them a hug, a kiss, a kind word, or just to “give ‘em five” for a job well done.
But God has called you to be more than just another “Ideal Mom,” He has called you to do His work. Whether that’s walking along side your child as they try to learn new skills, providing dinner for your family, advocating for services for your child, trying to afford just the basics, trying to get insurance to cover the treatments your child needs, or teaching them about God through the work of your hands. Wherever you are, be committed to God’s will for your life and have faith that although sometimes the troubles of this world may seem much too big for you to handle on your own, they are never too big for God.
This season of your life will end.
Much like some day this world will end.
Your children won’t always want to come to the park with you, Mommy. They won’t always spin and twirl to make their new dress swish, they won’t always call out, “WATCH ME!”
BUT…the world might….just maybe….be a little bit better place because of the kind of Mom you were!
So….call your Mom or sister or friend to receive the encouragement you need to make it till the end of the day….take a moment to forget about your problems and focus on something else (like a good book or a game of Dice with Friends) that doesn’t remind you of your current troubles…. Don’t try to be a “perfect mom”….just be a “mom,” the kind of mom God created YOU to be, and don’t worry about the kind of mom everyone else thinks you should be. After all….His opinion is the only one that really matters anyway.